How to Find Intended Parents and What to Look For

How to Find Intended Parents and What to Look For

Becoming a surrogate mother requires the help, encouragement, and advisement of several parties. And it will mean entering into a unique relationship with the intended parents with whom you’re working. So, we recommend that your choice of intended parents is made with careful discernment and consideration. This relationship will influence everything about your experience as a surrogate mother, so make sure it’s a great one!

Before you can choose your intended parents, you will first need to select an agency. Their influence and involvement in your surrogacy process will make a significant impact on your entire experience. Here are a few things to consider while choosing an agency with whom to work:

  1. Their reputation– Consider what other people are saying about this agency. Do intended parents, other surrogates, and competing clinics speak highly of their services? One especially valuable check is to ensure that an agency adheres to the guideline of the American Society of Reproductive Medicine. This will filter out any particularly poor-performing agencies as you search.
  2. The available resources– Look for an agency that will provide a variety of resources. Things like insurance, surrogacy escrow, and postpartum help are exceptionally valuable to your positive surrogacy experience.
  3. Experienced staff– When it comes to a surrogacy agency, experience matters. Ensure that its staff members are experienced and fully prepared to handle all aspects of the surrogacy process. Consider their experience from a business, mental health, and a legal perspective.

Upon selecting the best agency for your needs and values, you’ll be prompted to choose your intended parents. Doing so may be more challenging than choosing an agency and will require your consideration of several points.

What to look for when pairing with intended parents. 

  1. Similarities in communication preferences– How do you anticipate or prefer communication with the intended parents? Will you call, text, or email? Will your communication be in-depth and constant, or will it reflect a more professional tone? As these communication types vary, be sure to find parents with preferences in line with your own.
  2. Similarities in expectations for their involvement in your pregnancy– Consider what you’d prefer and their intentions for attending your doctor’s appointments. If they are local, do they plan to accompany you to these? Or will they FaceTime you if they’re from out of town? What does the birth plan look like? And most importantly, with what are you comfortable in these terms? Be sure that these expectations and preferences are in line and clearly understood.
  3. Similarities in your future contact– What does the future look like for your relationship? Will your communication be sparse or frequent? Carefully consider your preferences. Your relationship with the parents, once the child is born, may be as distant or involved as you like. But be sure that this is discussed and agreed upon before creating your partnership.
  4. Communication and support are two critical factors in your positive experience as a surrogate mother. From start to finish, you should receive exceptional care and helpful resources throughout your journey. This requires first connecting with your agency and then your intended parents.

Support looks different for everyone. That’s why we at Future Generation are committed to serving your particular needs in this unique and beautiful journey. Reach out today if you are considering becoming a surrogate mother in Orange County, San Diego, or the Inland Empire.

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